My Sunday started with church on the couch (yes, it is okay to go to church on the couch!). The morning’s sermon was brought to us by Matthew Hagee, son of well-known minister John Hagee. I had never heard either of them speak, but God must have known that it was my day to meet Matthew through the television (modern technology is amazing). He spoke on the power of God, but took it one step further by explaining that the power of God is in each and every believer. We have a well of power. Unfortunately, many of us don’t access the available power. That was the point that struck me. I have the power within me to do whatever I need to do because Christ is in me. Yet, I am often not power full but rather power blind. I fail to see what is in me.
My head went into a tail spin. How many times I have been overcome with doubt, insecurity, lack of belief, fear, impatience, stubbornness… you get the idea. Countless times. That also means countless times I have not dipped into the well of power within my spirit. Now that just doesn’t make any sense. Why would I struggle through things, fight back tears, cry out in desperation, experience hopelessness, whatever it may be when all I had to do, all I have to do is look within? I don’t have a good answer for you. But what I can tell you is that going forward I plan to dive into the well of power. I want to be power full.
There were a couple of things that God laid on my heart as I listened to Matthew talk about power. The first thing was Discovering Me. I know – like I know my own name – that God has asked me to write Discovering Me. It is a personal story of discovering my worth and value but more importantly discovering who Christ is in my life. However, hanging over my head is the chronic thought of “who cares.” Who cares about my life? Who cares about what I have to say? My story is not special. I am just an ordinary girl who has lived a good life. Who wants to read about that? As I listened, I realized that it is not my responsibility to make the book a success. It is not my responsibility to grow readership. God will handle that. My responsibility is to write the book. I need to tap into the power within me, the power God has given me, and put words to paper. He will take care of the rest. And if He needs me to do something else along the way, He will show me. But what if I don’t write the right words? What if the book doesn’t make any sense? Again, not what I need to focus on. I simply need to go to the well of power, drink up until I am full, and get to writing.
The second thing that struck me this morning was encouragement. There is a fine line between encouraging someone and telling them what they should do with their life. God has given me the gift of encouragement. I’ve known that for a long time and in recent months it has been confirmed (does anyone remember stretcher bearer cards at Brethren?). Nothing gives me more joy than being able to express to someone how valuable they are, how important they are and how much they are loved. When I have felt my most unlovable, worthless, can’t get anything right… God has blessed me with family, friends and even strangers who’ve walked alongside me and encouraged me every step of the way. You know what they did? They loved me for who I was. That’s what I want to do. I want to love people for who they are, just the way they are. God made each and every one of us, and He loves every single person on this planet. Sadly, many people are unable or unwilling to accept His unconditional love. They are determined to walk this life on their own. I don’t know how they do it, how they face each day without hope, without His power, His strength, His love. Who He is and what He has done so I can live this life is what gets me up every morning.
Last week I was spending precious time with a sweet friend. I found myself wanting to help her, wanting to take away any struggles, pain, frustration, etc. In my helping I realized I was giving advice, a “try this or that” kind of talk, you get the idea. I ended up apologizing to her because I realized that I wasn’t helping her; if anything I was making things worse. What she needs more than anything is true love and acceptance. If change needs to come about then when she is ready she’ll be ready. It’s not my place to change her. She doesn’t need to change! My point in all of this is to show that even when we desperately want to help someone, sometimes the best thing we can do is just love and listen. I can access God’s power to just love and listen. The rest is up to Him, not Megan. In those moments with my friend all I needed to do was dip into the well of His power and let Him shine.
It kills me to see people hurting. I’ve been there. I have been lost. I have made mistakes. I have struggled (and continue to struggle) with depression. I have self doubt. I have weight issues. I face insecurity and self loathing a lot. I get it. But I also get that God loves me, and He accepts me no matter what and there is nothing I can ever do that will change His love for me. Nothing. And He feels that way about you too. I believe that with every fiber of my being.
People think that believing in God in some way puts shackles on their life. They can’t really live and enjoy their life. That’s just not true. Believing in God is what fills the void in our lives. Believing in God gives us the power to do things and deal with things we never thought possible. Believing in God brings hope to a hopeless world. Believing in God is the only thing that makes sense, at least to me.
I found myself apologizing to my friend a second time for talking so overtly about what I believe, about my faith. I never want to shove what I believe down someone’s throat – never. But you know what, we are supposed to let our light shine. I am not supposed to hide it under a bush and keep it a secret. I don’t need to be over the top and pushy, but I can be me and show my love for God. I can be me and love others because God has given me the power to love and accept others. I can be me and cry when I feel someone’s pain. I can be me and not ever be ashamed. Why would I ever want to hide the best thing that has ever happened to me? Why not shout it front the rooftops?
I am power full through Christ Who gave His very life so I might live. So I might be able to wrap my arms around the people in my life and show them how much they are loved. How much Jesus loves them… just the way they are. My head is flooded with names of people who are hurting. If you are hurting and just want someone to love you and listen, please reach out to me. Visit my Reach Me page for ways to connect.
I will boldly go forward and share what Christ has done for me (don’t worry you will not find me preaching from street corners). I will still claim that there is nothing extraordinary about me. I am just a girl who wants to help other women know their worth and help them access the power they have within them because of Christ. I now know the journey of Discovering Me is to become relatable. On the surface everyone thinks I’ve got it all together. Ha! I am 38 years old and I am still a mess. But I am a mess who God loves dearly. And I think it is important for people to see the messy parts of my life that are coated in God’s love, grace, mercy and blessing. He wants to bring hope, joy and peace to every single one of us. John 10:10 says, “I have come that you might have and enjoy your life, in abundance, until it overflows.” AMEN!
I am thankful for everyone who has taken the time to read this. If you are feeling bold, please pass my words along. If you think something I have said could be helpful to someone, don’t hesitate. May we all be power full in Him.